I have time again. This weekend was a blur of frenetic stage energy. I'm actually pretty proud of our department. And I did grow as a performer. So in all, it was still worth the ball-ache.
I'm bored, which sounds bad, but its actually kind of great because I only feel bored, instead of bored and depressed, which has been the status quo for a while. It means I can motivate myself again instead of feeling as though everything I do is to no avail.
I've been thinking more about my possibilty of being polyamorous. I'm not sure I'll be applying it any time soon, but since I've accepted the fact that I desire other people (and honestly have during mine and Sam's relationship), my anxiety over his future hookups seems to have disappeared almost entirely. It was all related to my own guilt and shame. Go figure.