I can stil become markedly jealous over someone's ability to just unashamedly be themselves, despite how stupid, silly or superficial they may be at times. I've been guilty of taking myself far too seriously, and trying to posture myself for others in every role of my life. I heard a saying once, that if you find yourself as being a chameleon, that is, you can change yourself into anything for anybody, then you likely have no identity of your own. I think that's a little simplistic, not to mention I'm paraphrasing at best, but it has some salt to it. I think "I" went into hiding for a while. Though its been long enough that the "I" needs a little redefining.